I feel doubt creeping in. But I see myself challenging that doubt. I tell myself, “It’s ok. Stop comparing. Stop doubting yourself. You can do this.” I notice my heart racing. I feel the blood rushing to my head, and it’s like there’s a crowd outside an invisible gate and I feel them fighting to break it down to get through. I’m noticing this gate, and I realize it’s my boundary, and I am encouraging myself to keep it strong. I am proud of myself. My heart hasn’t buckled to the pressure; I’m not fearful of the crowd. I’m not afraid that they’ll break my gate down. I’m confident in the boundary that I have, and I’m talking back and believing it. And I’m choosing to move forward in whatever fear is attempting to block me from.
You can do this. You will figure it out.
And that crowd dissipates. The shadowy force pushing them dissipates. But then another thought comes. What if I’m not enough? What if…
And Maverick City’s song, Jireh begins to play. I've grown to like this strange song. . My spirit has taken up arms, ready to remind me what I momentarily forgot:
I am already loved.
I am already chosen.
I am already loved, more than I could imagine.
And that is enough.
So, I come into agreement with the words, remembering that I am a daughter of the Most High God. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am enough.
Yes, doubt has been knock, knock, knocking. But these first 7 days of 2022, I stood my ground and fought back.
